A Reluctant Left

To love the Holy Spirit is to obey His promptings. 

In my walk with God, I have often found myself professing untold love for Him, but not willing to obey. There are many incidents in my life where I have consciously and voluntarily disobeyed the promptings of the Holy Spirit because I was living in the flesh. But, growing closer to God means that not only do I know that there is no peace without obedience to Him, but also that there is no other path I wish to travel than the one appointed for me by Him. 

Or so I thought. 

It was midmorning last weekend, just before Pongal. The crowds and the traffic - on the usually not very populated road - were bordering on crazy. But, I was enjoying the drive, soaking in the festive spirit and looking forward to guzzling sugarcanes at home. I was returning from a routine doctor's appointment and was driving down 6th Avenue. My usual route required me to keep driving down straight; but as I approached the junction where one could take a left or continue straight down, I saw the cars slow down owing to a huge concrete mixer that was blocking the road about two hundred meters away. 

But, even before I had reached the junction, before the vehicles had begun to slow down and before I noticed the concrete mixer, I had heard Him say, "Take the left". 

I know that for those who do not believe or have not experienced the voice of the Holy Spirit (or might give it other names like 'something' or 'intuition') it might not make sense. The voice I heard was within me, but not from me. It was loud, clear and urgent.

You would think that someone who had, at multiple times, experienced the pain that comes from disobedience to God's voice would double down, drop everything and do as asked (for that's what He does...ask of us) - not this rebellious lady, no. The vehicles began to move, the traffic began to clear and I accelerated to take the straight road ahead. But, the Holy Spirit asked of me to take the left, again.

What do you do when someone you love and Someone who loves you most perfectly asks something of you? When you know that submitting to Him and what He asks of you can only give you peace and draw you nearer to Him, what do you do? When you know that He is either protecting you or using you as an instrument, what do you do?

You take the left. 

It was reluctant, it was an exaggerated turn and it annoyed many behind me (heard it in the honks) - but to the left I turned. Barely had I driven for thirty seconds when the car in front of me began to swerve; my heart lurched thinking that the driver had fainted or was losing control of the vehicle. There were two boys and a girl walking on the side of the road and the car was headed straight to them; this out-of-control-car came so close to the boy standing nearest to the road and, just like that, swerved away. All three of them screamed, I gasped and the onlookers were shocked. 

Still in shock, I now noticed that the driver's hand was outside the window, holding on the the roof of the car and beating it rhythmically and aggressively - as if in tune to some music. The driver continued to do this swerve-out-of-control-almost-hit-someone-and-swerve-back thing at least another three to four times as I was driving behind him. By the time he had done it the first time, I knew why I had been asked to take the left - I prayed. I prayed over the driver, over the people he was terrorising and whatever else he was doing (being led to do) to cause havoc, panic and probably destroy. 

About half a kilometre down was my way home; with one final look at the car and a prayer on my lips, I turned and headed home. 

What happened to the car and the driver - I don't know. Was he caught? Was he supernaturally stopped? Did his car suddenly stop working? I don't know. All I know is that the Spirit asked me to take a left and I did. He showed me the purpose for which I had been asked to take a turn - and I prayed. God using me as an instrument to intercede is like the teacher choosing the most unreliable and naughtiest child in class to carry the test papers to the staff room. But, when you love the teacher, you will take every effort to make sure the papers reach the staff room in one piece. 

He loved us first..and when we finally see that love, we love Him back- truly and for what He is; and then, we obey. Maybe reluctantly, maybe in fits and starts...but we do it any way, until one day there is nothing but obedience and love, and you can't tell one from the other.